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I want to be as awesome as @FakeDanSavage when I grow up.
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I asked him if he was ready to make love, and he nodded and got out the aspirin. I put one between my knees. All the girls were doing it these days. It turns out there are still a lot of sexual acts you can do while holding an aspirin between your knees — for more information, Google anything. (Nyquil between your knees is a little harder, but if you want to make it really fun, try a de-humidifier.)
Liz Meriwether, “What It’s Like To Sleep With Mitt Romney”
From: The Hollywood Reporter’s May 4th issue.
Posted on April 27, 2012 with 2 notes
Source: hollywoodreporter.com
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There isn’t a day that goes by where I’m not thankful that I didn’t need student loans.
Posted on April 24, 2012 with 5 notes
Source: abcnews.go.com
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“Good pic of my son Jimmy’s bulldog, Apollo - I’m sorry Mr. President, he’s not on the menu!” - @SenJohnMcCain
Fucking seriously?
Oh, @SenJohnMcCain… Still a sore loser, eh?
Posted on April 19, 2012 via Brooklyn Mutt with 25 notes
Source: brooklynmutt
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Barack is straight up choking my dashboard.
I am about to unfollow THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.
It’s all Mitt Romney’s fault. Jerk.
(via laughterkey)
Posted on March 19, 2012 via American Aquarium Drinker with 77 notes
Source: daveholmes
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I mean SERIOUSLY. Given a choice between:
1) supporting an entirely uncontroversial speech that decried the state-sponsored KILLING AND IMPRISONMENT OF INNOCENT PEOPLE FOR THEIR REAL OR PERCEIVED SEXUAL ORIENTATION (which of course no GOP presidential hopeful would dare, because it was Hillary Clinton doing the speechifying and all of these people are children), or
2) saying nothing,
Rick Perry went to his tool shed and BUILT door number three, which is OPENLY SYMPATHIZING WITH THE PEOPLE WHO KILL AND IMPRISON INNOCENT PEOPLE FOR THEIR REAL OR PERCEIVED SEXUAL ORIENTATION, and then opened the fuck out of it in about 9 seconds.Rick Perry said: “There is ground to be gained in this race for THE PRESIDENCY OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA by presenting myself as someone who OPENLY SYMPATHIZES WITH THE PEOPLE WHO KILL AND IMPRISON INNOCENT PEOPLE FOR THEIR REAL OR PERCEIVED SEXUAL ORIENTATION, so I’d better hurry up and grab that spot.” And maybe not figuratively!
Man oh man. I am not prone to statements such as these, but: Rick Perry, you are a baboon. And any conservative who thinks gay people should be ALLOWED TO REMAIN ALIVE- to say nothing of actual gay conservative groups like Log Cabin and GOProud, whose silence is the loudest thing I’ve ever heard and I have seen My Bloody Valentine live- y’all better start speaking up RIGHT NOW.
RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
THIS. All of this.
Posted on December 6, 2011 via American Aquarium Drinker with 183 notes
Source: daveholmes
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Is it too early to start making Warren 2016 bumper stickers yet?
(via wilwheaton)
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Meghan McCain interviews Donald Trump and practically begs for job.
In other news, I lose any bit of respect I may have had for her. Seriously, Meghan? You were supposed to be one of the SANE conservatives.
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Worst of all, this is a vision that says even though America can’t afford to invest in education or clean energy; even though we can’t afford to care for seniors and poor children, we can somehow afford more than $1 trillion in new tax breaks for the wealthy. Think about it. In the last decade, the average income of the bottom 90% of all working Americans actually declined. The top 1% saw their income rise by an average of more than a quarter of a million dollars each. And that’s who needs to pay less taxes? They want to give people like me a two hundred thousand dollar tax cut that’s paid for by asking thirty three seniors to each pay six thousand dollars more in health costs? That’s not right, and it’s not going to happen as long as I’m President.
Posted on April 13, 2011 via Pantsless Progressive with 2,613 notes
Source: whitehouse.gov
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This plays in my head over and over again whenever I hear a Republican speak.
Posted on March 12, 2011 via tusk81
Source: tusk81
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Down with DOMA! Woohoo!
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goddamn you half-japanese girls: Here are the Senators who voted against the repeal of DADT. Do with it what you will.
Alexander (R-TN), Nay
Barrasso (R-WY), Nay
Bennett (R-UT), Nay
Bond (R-MO), Nay
Brown (R-MA), Nay
Bunning (R-KY), Nay
Burr (R-NC), Nay
Chambliss (R-GA), Nay
Coburn (R-OK), Nay
Cochran (R-MS), Nay
Collins (R-ME), Yea
Corker (R-TN), Nay
Crapo (R-ID), Nay
DeMint (R-SC), NayEnsign (R-NV), Nay
Enzi (R-WY), Nay
Graham (R-SC), Nay
Grassley (R-IA), Nay
Gregg (R-NH), Nay
Hatch (R-UT), Nay
Hutchison (R-TX), Nay
Inhofe (R-OK), Nay
Isakson (R-GA), Nay
Johanns (R-NE), Nay
Kirk (R-IL), Nay
Kyl (R-AZ), Nay
LeMieux (R-FL), Nay
Lugar (R-IN), Nay
Manchin (D-WV), Nay
McCain (R-AZ), Nay
McConnell (R-KY), Nay
Murkowski (R-AK), Nay
Risch (R-ID), Nay
Roberts (R-KS), Nay
Sessions (R-AL), Nay
Shelby (R-AL), Nay
Snowe (R-ME), Nay
Thune (R-SD), Nay
Vitter (R-LA), Nay
Voinovich (R-OH), Nay
Wicker (R-MS), NayGlad that Bob Menendez & Frank Lautenberg aren’t on this list.
Posted on December 9, 2010 via cool cool cool with 15 notes
Source: betternovembers
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Reason #4,597,360 why @CoryBooker is so awesome.
